Occasionally, one or the other of us will be asked whether we have pet names for each other. He seems to get this question more often.
The answer is, sort of.
In true geek form, we have adopted internet abbreviations of the terms of endearment used by Khal Drogo (sigh!) and Daenerys (aka the Khaleesi aka–spoiler alert–the Dragon). She calls him “My sun and stars” and he calls her “Moon of my life.” I find these names honestly poetic, but perhaps too much so for use in a relationship. After all, I do not live in a Shakespeare play–nor do I think I would want to, as a side note. I did say it would be funny if we adopted them for every day use, such as in the following examples:
My sun and stars, we seem to be out of milk.
Moon of my life, don’t forget to take the washing out of the machine.
Because at the moment we are in a long distance relationship, this has taken on an added internet dimension. First he started by abbreviating it to moml, and I responded with msas. Then we started with emoticons: and & . He even found animated ones with a sun rising, which I don’t know how he did because I can’t even refind it on my email. This then proceeded to him saying “moml” as though it was a word. I have less success–“msas” isn’t exactly easy to pronounce.
This makes me think, though. I like the idea of a somewhat more earnest nickname as well. Once he called me “sweet pea” which I thought was really cute, to the point of blushing over it. It’s a nice idea to be something flowery and feminine. Some girls hate the idea of pink and such; I am not one of them. Moreover, I really liked the unironic use of a term of endearment.
I’ve always wanted, but never really had, a good nickname. My sister has one for me which is god-awful, and which she is trying to make catch on. I have told msas that if he calls me by that nickname ever, it’s over. I tried Carrie for awhile when I was 10 or 11, and it didn’t stick. When I was a lonely 6th grader I dreamed of reinventing myself in high school, and that reinvention would begin with a nickname. That didn’t happen. In fact, my band teacher was notorious for giving students interesting nicknames (“Crazy Lips Flores,” e.g.), and I never got one.
The thing about nicknames is that they are a private/ public way of saying “you belong to me.” Not in a creepy possessive way, but more a you’re-a-part-of-my-life way. It’s the same reason ‘we’ and ‘us’ are such lovely words, because it’s shorthand for saying that I mean something to someone, and they in turn mean something to me. Obviously there are the offhand terms of endearment like dear and honey and sweetheart, but I like the idea of something more unique and special. For now, msas is working for me.
A postscript–It strikes me that I need a way to reference him on this blog, as it would be an obvious faux pas. I shall have to wait for inspiration to strike (probably in the form of him dictating an idea to me).